what were they thinking (running clothes edition)?!

adultonsieLululemon’s new line is out and they must be smoking some serious weed up in Vancouver because they have debuted a $98 running outfit that has had me scratching my head and trying to figure out why all day long.

They call it the RUNSIE.  It is a Running Onsie. A Running Romper. A Running Jumpsuit.

Just think about that for a moment.

Now think about long training runs and races.

Now think about public bathrooms and porta potties.

Why in fucking hell would anyone who has ever run even ONE MILE design a JUMPSUIT to run in? Are they fucking with us or just so so so so very goddamned clueless?

Here is the copy for the RUNSIE:

why we made this (indeed, Lululemon, WHY did you?!)

We made this easy onesie to keep us cool and collected when we’re pounding the pavement. Lightweight and breathable, it layers easily over our favourite bra so that we can stay comfortable wherever our summer run takes us. (except the bathroom. They don’t ever want us to have to pee, or get the trots, or have runner’s tummy. Seriously, what the HELL Lululemon?!)

fabric + features

  • Swift Ultra Light fabric is sweat-wicking and breathable with four-way stretch
  • ultralight liner wicks sweat away from your skin and helps keep things from riding up
  • hand pockets and a secure zipper pocket to store your essentials
  • secret liner stash pocket for your key
  • adjustable shoulder straps let you find your perfect fit
  • drawcord lets you cinch your Runsie mid-stride
  • imported

Here are some front and rear views of this running straightjacket:

runsiefrontrunsie backThis lovely “no you cannot go pee without stripping down to your sports bra in a porta potty” $98 garment comes in this lovely pattern of… what IS that exactly? My friend, the mother of a toddler, said “It comes in the shades of black and barf print” and so now all I see is vomit.

What say you? Would YOU wear Lululemon’s RUNSIE for your next run? I hear it is the envy of the 6 to 18 month old set!

Oh and by the way 33 days until the San Francisco Marathon.

 

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